Posted by: Kristy | September 1, 2009

OK, so I caved.

I think Pete’s lonely.

I’m not sure why he would be. I mean, it’s not like less than a week ago he ATE his only friend.

Wait, that’s right … less than a week ago he ATE his only friend and now he’s paying the consequences of being by his lonesome all day.

I even told him I wasn’t buying him a new fish. Nuh-huh. No way, now how.

Nopes.

So now he just sits in a hump down beneath his bridge and looks at me. Comes out for meals but only pokes halfheartedly at the flakes as the float down onto his nose. It’s depressing, let me tell you.

Since when can a frog depress me? Since now, I guess.

So the hilarity of the situation comes at this point:

The Boy and I were at the German-American Festival this weekend, enjoying good (but not awesome) beer (since it wasn’t Irish), delish food and people watching to the extreme. I scarfed a wiener schnitzel sandwich while some frat boys sauntered by, complete with pop-collared polo shirts accented with boot-shaped beer glasses suspended from their necks by lanyards. He grabbed a bratwurst while a couple mullets and their attached rednecks passed a pitcher of beer around their circle. We split some pommes frites as two guys walked by with their beer guts spilling over their lederhosen and feathers perched jauntily in their felt hats.

Oh, Toledo. You kill me.

And then we stumbled on the children’s carnival rides area. Spinning carnival rides are a great idea to stick in the middle of a few hundred beer-guzzling adults. Let’s pound a pitcher and hop on the strawberries that twist in an ever-faster circle! Add some grease on a bun and take a turn on the twirling wheel that spins you upside down. That just creates a new game: Vaulting Vomit Dodging.

In the middle though I stopped and thought of nothing but Pete, for there, amidst lines of tiny glass bowls filled with water, was my chance to bring some sunshine back into my little frog’s life. Or some new nourishment to his little belly. Whatev.

“Win a Goldfish.”

Heck, it was $2 and I thought it would be fun to try landing a lopsided ping pong ball into a glass bowl the size of a drinking glass 5 feet away. Let’s win a fish, haha. Ha.

Ha.

Ha. Ha.

Let me introduce you to Gilbert.

Gilbert

The sad part is that I was playing along with three children who couldn’t be older than 2 years. And who also won fish. Look at us, we’re all winners.

Especially Gilbert. Who has no idea what he’s in for. Poor Gil. Is putting a third fish in the same bowl as Pete animal cruelty? I think maybe, quite possibly.

Only time will tell.

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Responses

  1. “mullets and the rednecks attached to them.” you slay me.


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