Posted by: Kristy | April 20, 2009

I’m gonna get fat and it’s all my iPod’s fault

Dear Fellow Urban Active Fitness Goer:

Thank you so very much for rescuing my black second-generation iPod nano from the place I accidentally left it when I finished my workout the other day.

I am sure it was very sad, lonely and scared, laying next to the free weights near the ladies’ locker room. When I so cruelly and irresponsibly abandoned it in my exhausted rush to drive 45 minutes to my apartment and my waiting bed. I am a terrible iPod owner. I know. I hang my head in shame.

Thank you for recognizing the precious nature of my sweet, innocent music machine. The green iPod sock with well-worn edges carefully protecting the device my parents gave me for my 22nd birthday. The lovingly constructed playlists that motivate me through “Getting Hot,” “Loving Jesusness,” “Starting Fresh” and other various activities and situations. Despite it’s old-school nature and inability to play music videos, TV shows or feature films, I love that iPod. We have spent many, many sweaty nights together — on the elliptical.

I appreciate you turning your find into the Lost and Found drawer at the fitness center’s front desk. Except … I’m sure you just don’t realize … you turned in the dirty iPod sock and frayed earbuds but forgot to leave the iPod itself. I’m sure it was an honest mistake. An oversight.

No need to be embarrassed, we all make mistakes. Such as putting another person’s mp3 player in our pocket. Next time you go to work out, will you please add the iPod to the front desk’s loot? Please, feel free to use it first. No harm no foul.

It’s just that I kind of can’t work out without it. It’s like I’m missing my teammate. My partner. My best workout cheerleader.

And I really don’t want to get fat. That would kind of bite. I mean, I suppose I could muddle through listening to myself breath and to the bald old guy with back hair sprouting out of his T-shirt neck sing under his breath, but it’s an enhanced workout when backed with “Hey Mama” and “Mmmmbop.” I’m just sayin’.





  1. oh man! that would suck! here’s hopin’ it gets returned!

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