Posted by: Kristy | April 19, 2009

Here’s hoping I don’t sound like a chipmunk

As of more than half-way through Sunday, this weekend has rocked. I realize there are a few more hours in the day, but I’m pretty sure I’ll finish up the last three days in a blaze of glory called rested and refreshed.

Getting out of the office for two full days. Dan’s amazing scrambled eggs that I have yet to be able to replicate. A couple of miles walking in the sunshine. Four hours of girl time and Olive Garden with Amanda. Brunch with the G-rents. A church cookout tonight. I promise most of my happiness is not associated with food, it just seems that way. It’s the fellowship. Or maybe it’s both. But I digress.

My blaze of glory also will emit beams of light called yet another reason I’m convinced God created my life just to give himself a form of entertainment.

I give you: The Mad Adventures of Kristin and God — You Have Energy, Can We Put You on Camera?

If you ever have explored the “about me” section around here, the tab wherein you can get “The Scoop” about my zaniness (since I know you all just live to know more about me) you are aware that I am a print journalist. PRINT.

As in, ink on paper. Words on page. Perfectly punctuated sentences wed with beautifully accurate and timely information served on a platter of crisp, well-designed newsprint can take me to a state of slight euphoria. It’s almost orgasmic, not gonna lie. (That would be a chuckle-inducing exaggeration except, well, it’s true.)

Which explains why I have been known to say multiple times, “I have no desire to be a broadcast journalist. None. I will leave the field before I go into broadcast.”

I left the field. I’m taking a break until this little temper tantrum, teen-aged identity crisis settles down and I see where I as a copy editor and page designer  fit in with the way the industry’s changed.

My biggest beef with broadcast from a non-reporting side is that I a) hate the sight of myself on camera and b) hate the sound of my own voice even more.*

This complex stems from my younger years before I understood the concepts of professionalism and voice moderation. When I became (OK, OK, become, present tense) entranced in an uber-zealous, passionate state — also known as overly excited or high-strung by some — my speech gains momentum and pitch until I sound like a chipmunk with ADHD syndrome and a crack addiction.

I learned to control this since hearing a voice mail message I left my grandmother when I was 15 years old. Dogs in backyards three counties away could hear me, I was that high pitched. It is better now. I sound like a woman. Not a rodent. Whew.

Get that camera and microphone away from me, thank you.

And if you visit sometime, oh, next week, you should see just how far my indignant “I am a WRITER” rant has gotten me.

While visiting salons in the Columbus area Friday just to let them know the TONI&GUY Hairdressing Academy in Toledo now exists I stopped at Salon Lofts. This is a really unique setup where independent contractor stylists each have their own “loft” type room, set up in a very metropolitan, funky and trendy building.

The first person to meet me at the door was the owner, which I think is fantastic when a manager is involved in the day-to-day activity of his or her business. We had a great conversation wherein I got on a roll about who we are, what sets us apart and the importance of an education such as that which students receive at TONI&GUY. And he just kept prompting me and letting me talk, and smiling and nodding and finally said

“We’re actually making a video for our Web site about the importance of education. You are just pure energy. Can I get you on camera?”

Ummmmm, I get to talk about my academy? And how we understand what is necessary to be successful? And how we want to help change and promote the face of the industry? And you agree with me? And it’s going to be online? For people to, you know, to watch?

Gosh, twist my arm a little harder. OK, OK, I’ll do it.

I tried to breathe. And speak slowly. I was wishing I had a tiny cold so my voice was more Billie Holiday and less Hammy from “Over the Hedge.”

I’m sure it was fine. But I guess now I can get over my fears and start gunning for Katie Couric’s job.

* At this point those who know me and love me are rolling their eyes, chuckling and one or two probably are saying, “Oh, good lord, Kristin.” You know who you are. Don’t make me drive down there and hurt you. I still might if you’re making fajitas for dinner.


  1. i checked the website out and watched all the videos and sad, no kristin. but then i reread your post. next week. got it.
    so when do we get to hang out? soon i hope. i need a dose of kris!

  2. From someone that does some broadcasting, your post made me chuckle, but I am sure you did just fine. Everyone is different when they appear on camera, some people love it and others want to be behind the camera, but you would do a good job in front of the camera.

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