Posted by: Kristy | April 1, 2009

Dear Zac Efron, good call

Today is Wednesday, which translates to “Kristin cannot focus right around 11:30 a.m.” — which leads to mass amounts of Google News between that time and whenever my brain comes back from vacation.

(Hey, it’s part of my job to remain well-informed, OK?)

Anyway … I discovered a tidbit that made my carefully and intentionally tousled ‘do stand even more on-end. Good think my office door was closed to muffle my shriek of terror.

DID YOU KNOW PARAMOUNT IS PLANNING A REMAKE OF “FOOTLOOSE”? 

I realize I’m about to skewer myself — please hold while I crawl up on the cross and hold my arms out for the hammer and nails — but … the last thing the world needs is a remake of “Footloose.”

Seriously, y’all. The film was bad the first time around. I don’t care if it’s “a cult classic.” Yes, I adore musicals in their many varied shapes, sizes and key signatures but “Footloose” is the film that made me understand the irony behind the fact that Kevin Bacon’s last name is Bacon.

There is no part of me that would want to date Ren. He may be an awesome gymnast and dancer, and the whole bad-boy-change-the-world thing is OK. But the hokey dialogue, the aggravating plot lines … maybe those are the things that make the film endearing. It just makes me realize that the ’80s were too crazy to want to repeat anytime soon.

Except I guess we’re screwed because trends tend to repeat every 20 years. Huh. It all makes sense now — mullets, leg warmers as clothing, resurrecting Kevin Bacon’s gyrating greasiness in the form of ….

Zac Efron.

Yep, our very own Wildcat, Mr. Troy Bolton himself, is kicking off his Sunday shoes and trading in his basketball jersey and floppy hair for skinny jeans, ripped sweatshirts and, well, gyrating.

I suppose Zac Efron’s hair at this year’s Academy Awards proves he is ready to take on the persona of grease ball heart throb of the current age of boy-crazed teen-aged girls. (His role in “Hairspray” was prep work for the role.) He already has clean-cut jock down cold.

However, Efron apparently removed himself from the film earlier this year so as not to become pigeon-holed as the musical leading-man type until he cements himself more firmly in a well-rounded career.

Professionally, from an objective perspective, that was probably smart. Now, subjectively, that was REALLY smart. In all seriousness, Efron was a great choice. But I think an even better choice would be to let the project go completely. People already love it as-is. Keep a classic a classic — people will still love it (and I will be allowed to refrain from watching it in its classic form). If they make a new one I’ll just have to make fun of it. And that would make me sad because, again, musical theater rocks. When it’s good.

The only thing I LIKE about “Footloose” is that the dancing world got a really great jive out of it. So I’m OK with that part.

Honestly, it would be like remaking “Dirty Dancing.” No one puts Baby in the corner, and no one is a better Johnny than Patrick Swayze (my lover, so hands-off, ladies).

I think they need to make a film version of “Wicked.” It wouldn’t be as hardcore and powerful as the stage version, but if they got the original cast together it would be ROCKIN.  Box office sales would probably defy gravity. I’m just sayin’.

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Responses

  1. […] in that I just yesterday made mention of the most amazing show on Broadway right now — and hours later found out it is coming on […]


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