Posted by: Kristy | March 22, 2009

Beneath every short girl is a great pair of heels

Dear U.S. Postal Service:

My Jimmy Choo pumps were supposed to arrive from New York yetserday. They were shipped 2-day priority.

Here is a photograph of my feet at this very moment.

The soles on these shoes are cracked and flopping, that's how long I've worn them. Time for something new, no?

The soles on these shoes are cracked and flopping, that's how long I've worn them. Time for something new, no?

Those clearly are not Jimmy Choos. They look more like a pair of plain black Shoe Carnival “Buy one, get one 1/2 off!” specials. Because they are. From September.

So, if you could please bring me my shoes tomorrow, my feet would appreciate it. I’m saving them to wear to the America’s Beauty Show in Chicago this weekend and am convinced they will make me even more successful at pretending I “know what’s up,” as it were.

Also, by not having them in my grubby little paws, you’re hindering the fulfillment of one of my material ambitions. And you don’t want to do that, do you? ‘Course not.

Thanks for your civil service!

Sincerely,

Kristin

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Responses

  1. […] Man, my feet even LOOK sexier than they did yesterday. […]


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